...
DRINK... From the Nectar of the Gods...
Ahhh, metal... The music of champions...
AIR GUITAR CHAMPIONS, that is! Last night was the competition, and I have to say that considering it was my first time out of the gate, I didn't do half bad.
I got to the Knitting Factory a bit early, and the scene was, honestly, pretty disorganized and negative. It re-enforced the things I dislike about KF as a venue: the people in charge are humorless dicks, and it's always uptight. It makes it so enjoying whatever you're there for is a challenge in and of itself. It took me awhile to find someone who knew what was going on with the Competition, but when I finally did I signed in and was asked to choose an Air Guitar Name. Nervousness and the pre-show beers left me a little unsure, so I came up with The Avid Swordsman, which seemed to go over fine. I hung upstairs with a beer and my green all-access bracelet and watched the opening band, a true Metal act called Gods of Fire. They were solid, and there was no irony in the fact that they love playing metal, and do it well. Which was quite refreshing.
No one told the competitors any order, so I just wound up hanging backstage chatting with a few other people. It's funny, the air guitar community really is just that: it's a small, insular community of people, all united by the thin and somewhat surreal thread of pretending to play instruments for the entertainment of others. There were dudes there who knew each other from previous years (I actually heard the phrase "yeah, I saw you in [insert city name]" a few times backstage. There were also some elaborate costumes, which made my typical jeans and faded black t-shirt kind of boring. And one of the criteria on which we were judged was Stage Presence, I understand if I came off kind of lame. I tried to make up for it with the verisimilitude of my playing (which was another of the three judging categories, the third of which being the elusive quality of "Airness").
Out of seventeen competitors, I went up third, which was a bit earlier than I would have liked, but I got over that quickly enough once I got out there. I threw my fist up, winked at the two comely lasses in the front, and got in my rock stance. The MC (last year's New York champion, imaginatively named "Bjorn To Rock") asked what song I was doing. Heheheheh...
"...And Justice For All" by Metallica. And the crowd screamed in approval.
HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED... (notice the smattering of boo's, right before I go into the thrash solo... heheheheh... What can I say, maybe it was an alienating song choice...) [JMP NOTE - I know, the link isn't functioning. I'll recompress the video file when I get to work on Monday, and repost it. Sorry for the inconvenience! And thanks for reading!]
So there it is, I played the US Air Guitar Championships. The judging was on a scale of 4.0 to 6.0 (which is apparently just like figure skating), and I scored consistent 5.0's across the board. That's fine by me, considering that one of the harsher scores given to a competitor was a scrawled drawing of a flaccid penis. Oh, those judges...
Next year, if (ok, let's not kid ourselves here... WHEN) I do this again, I'll probably choose a song that's a little better recognized, and go more for presence and less for exactness. But for now, I'm riding the wave of what fun it turned out to be. Before yesterday, could I have said I got up and air guitar-ed in front of a couple hundred screaming people?
Nope.
Thanks to US Air Guitar, the other competitors, and all who showed up and supported me... Don't stop-a-rockin'!!!
METAL... is about to rule the WO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-ORLD!!!!!!
*****N*T*G*****
Never hesitate to comment!
AIR GUITAR CHAMPIONS, that is! Last night was the competition, and I have to say that considering it was my first time out of the gate, I didn't do half bad.
I got to the Knitting Factory a bit early, and the scene was, honestly, pretty disorganized and negative. It re-enforced the things I dislike about KF as a venue: the people in charge are humorless dicks, and it's always uptight. It makes it so enjoying whatever you're there for is a challenge in and of itself. It took me awhile to find someone who knew what was going on with the Competition, but when I finally did I signed in and was asked to choose an Air Guitar Name. Nervousness and the pre-show beers left me a little unsure, so I came up with The Avid Swordsman, which seemed to go over fine. I hung upstairs with a beer and my green all-access bracelet and watched the opening band, a true Metal act called Gods of Fire. They were solid, and there was no irony in the fact that they love playing metal, and do it well. Which was quite refreshing.
No one told the competitors any order, so I just wound up hanging backstage chatting with a few other people. It's funny, the air guitar community really is just that: it's a small, insular community of people, all united by the thin and somewhat surreal thread of pretending to play instruments for the entertainment of others. There were dudes there who knew each other from previous years (I actually heard the phrase "yeah, I saw you in [insert city name]" a few times backstage. There were also some elaborate costumes, which made my typical jeans and faded black t-shirt kind of boring. And one of the criteria on which we were judged was Stage Presence, I understand if I came off kind of lame. I tried to make up for it with the verisimilitude of my playing (which was another of the three judging categories, the third of which being the elusive quality of "Airness").
Out of seventeen competitors, I went up third, which was a bit earlier than I would have liked, but I got over that quickly enough once I got out there. I threw my fist up, winked at the two comely lasses in the front, and got in my rock stance. The MC (last year's New York champion, imaginatively named "Bjorn To Rock") asked what song I was doing. Heheheheh...
"...And Justice For All" by Metallica. And the crowd screamed in approval.
HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED... (notice the smattering of boo's, right before I go into the thrash solo... heheheheh... What can I say, maybe it was an alienating song choice...) [JMP NOTE - I know, the link isn't functioning. I'll recompress the video file when I get to work on Monday, and repost it. Sorry for the inconvenience! And thanks for reading!]
So there it is, I played the US Air Guitar Championships. The judging was on a scale of 4.0 to 6.0 (which is apparently just like figure skating), and I scored consistent 5.0's across the board. That's fine by me, considering that one of the harsher scores given to a competitor was a scrawled drawing of a flaccid penis. Oh, those judges...
Next year, if (ok, let's not kid ourselves here... WHEN) I do this again, I'll probably choose a song that's a little better recognized, and go more for presence and less for exactness. But for now, I'm riding the wave of what fun it turned out to be. Before yesterday, could I have said I got up and air guitar-ed in front of a couple hundred screaming people?
Nope.
Thanks to US Air Guitar, the other competitors, and all who showed up and supported me... Don't stop-a-rockin'!!!
METAL... is about to rule the WO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-ORLD!!!!!!
*****N*T*G*****
Never hesitate to comment!
posted by JMP at 11:22 AM
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